Distractions Steal Your Life Away

It’s 5:30 pm, and I’m almost sprinting out of the office. By the time I reach my bicycle, I can’t contain my excitement any longer, and I let out a loud laugh. In a few minutes, I’ll be doing one of my most beloved hobbies: writing.

I fire up my laptop and open Notion – but before I do that, I really want to watch a YouTube video. Maybe listen to a snippet of a podcast. Even bounce cheerfully to one of my favorite songs. But after that, I’m going to start writing.

One more video. One more podcast. One more song.

Suddenly, it’s 9 pm. I’m tired from my day of work and all the “great fun” that I had watching videos. Not only has my motivation for writing disappeared, but also something immeasurably more precious: time.

Time, as far as I can tell, is one of the few finite resources we have in life. It’s also the one resource that gets tossed aside by so many people.

There’s this story that probably everybody has heard before. A man is offered $86,400 a day, but he has to spend it all in 24 hours. If he doesn’t, the bet is off, and he doesn’t receive the money anymore. The gist is that we all get the 86,400 every day – not in dollars, but in seconds.

But overused analogies aside, it’s the truth. Even if you had all the resources in the world, you couldn’t trade them for one more second of life.

I realized recently how bad it’s gotten. Consuming has become my default state. Also, I have trouble focusing for more than a few minutes. What’s more is that I can focus best when I’m engulfed in complete silence. No sound. It’s heaven to me.

My headphones think otherwise. For some reason, they always find their way back into my ears after mere seconds of boredom.

It’s no surprise when I take into account that I grew up with social media. Some of the largest and most powerful tech companies on the planet have weaponized audio and visuals to stimulate you into oblivion. However, it's not just black and white. These platforms can also be great education and entertainment tools when used with caution. But in this case, reckless consumption harbors dire consequences.

It leads to a life not lived.

However, two of my favorite thinkers seem to have come up with an escape plan from distraction purgatory.

Cal Newport advocates for what he calls a deep life. His idea combines creating depth in your relationships, work, and personal growth by limiting distractions and superficial engagements. In other words, focus on what matters to you in life. Chances are, watching the ninth re-run of How I Met Your Mother is not part of it (if it is, more power to you. Marshall is awesome).

But how do you find out what really matters to you?

George Mack, come on in, baby.

I mentioned George in this blog before, and once again, one of his ideas presents a solution to the problem: the Deathbed Razor. It sent me into an anxious frenzy the first time I read it.

The question that the Deathbed Razor asks is the following: “Would the self that lies on his or her deathbed look back at the thing you’re doing right now with joy and satisfaction?” If your answer is no, then stop doing it.

It’s a great thought experiment for evaluating what you spend time on. If you do this simple meditation just a few times, three to five things will appear again and again. These are the things that matter to the core of your being. For me, it’s the relationships with my loved ones, creativity, health, and doing something that enriches the world.

Of course, there are some caveats here. Your whole being might not burn for your day job with the all-engulfing flame of passion, but you still have to make a living. That’s just part of life. But there are also the other parts where you don’t have obligations, and the choice of what to do is yours. But what most people forget is that they also have to bear the responsibility of that choice. If you waste your time, you’re the only one to blame. No one else.

My automated thought pattern is that I want to work at my day job, work out, and then do something creative. What ends up happening is that I go through the motions at my day job, work out, and then substitute watching YouTube videos instead of doing something creative.

What a waste of time.

Consuming digital cocaine from time to time is fine. I do it, too. After a long day of work, the only thing more tempting than the couch and some good food is tapping the Instagram icon on your phone. But what would your dying self think of the minutes (or even hours) you spend scrolling? Would it be filled with joy? I think it would only feel one thing: regret.

I just turned 30 years old, and for the most part, life still feels endless. But sometimes, there are these glimpses that I get. It happens every time I think about what I want my future to be. And for the past months, these think trips include one crucial realization about the future: that it will end.

I think George hit the nail on the head when he quoted Confucius:

Every man has two lives, and the second one starts when he realizes he has just one.

Go for the things you want to go for. Do the things you want to do. Be stingy with your time. Find out what really matters to you, and then focus on it with intensity. Just imagine what your dying self would wish you had done. If it could, it would reach out with all its might and stop distractions from stealing your life away.